Number 2 and Number 4

OK, the weather is getting colder again and I've got a mom segment starting on a local radio station (http://www.y105music.com/ check out The Motherlode with Laura Ford Thursdays around 8:30am central) so I should probably get back to blogging.

I have a great idea for a blog, but I have to get back into the hang of things first so here's a couple of quick hits today.  They both seem to be hitting below the belt today, please bear with me.

Baby poo in the movies is no longer the bomb.  It's time to rest that (literal) crap now.  What is it about a movie with a baby in it that makes every writer include a scene with (usually) a male struggling to diaper that kid?   If you are a female you've probably had little brothers or sisters, babysitting jobs, and possibly kids of your own...it's time to ban diaper doody jokes.  If you are lucky enough to leave the house to catch a flick while still having someone in diapers, you literally deal with that s#!t everyday and it's not amusing.  I'm warning you movie execs, showing that scene in previews will prove to me there must not be anything with more hilarious merit in the movie and from now on I'll throw my $10 towards a talking car instead...and that's saying a lot.

What is "up" with you when you think sending your "equipment" via picture phone is gonna get any girl all hot and bothered?  Yes, I'm talking to you Brett Farve.  Let's put aside the fact that you are married with two grown daughters, OK?  No, wait a minute, what if you grabbed your daughter's cell phone and found a pic of some guys junk on it...what would you think?  What is (allegedly) wrong with you...too many concussions on the playing field?  If I ever received a pic on my phone with a guy fumbling his (foot)balls, I'd 1) laugh uncontrollably 2) drop that thing (cell phone/eyes) in some bleach and 3) if said unit were attached to someone famous, I'd send it to everyone on my contacts list.   Hey buddy, that's not sexy...everyone knows the pixel count on any given cell phone does not show anyone (or anyTHING) in the best light, why not just pose Seinfeldian George-style on a chazz-lounge for a portrait?  It would be awesome if a sexual harassment suspension broke your streak, but most likely by this time in your life, throwing money at any situation will make it all go away.  Nice lesson to teach the kiddos.  Next time, take your own advice and keep it in your Wranglers.

And as an aside, as his wife are you flattered that the chick he reportedly went after looks just like a younger you or does that bother you even more?  Can't say that guy doesn't have a 'type.'

Speaking of type, it's time to stop my typing and get out there and play with my kid.  I expect no hilarious diaper hijinx today though, she's potty trained.